A little about myself

So far, most of the entries here have been about my memories of you. But I thought you might like to know a little but more about me.

I run and own my own business in which I edit people's writing and help them get published. I edit all kinds of things but mainly novels and nonfiction manuscripts. I also write books, which help other people become better writers, get published, and sell their books; another set of my books is about how to hike with children (which is largely based on my experiences hiking with you when we were together!).


My company "logo."

Helping other people write better books brings me real pleasure. First, I like to read, so someone paying me to read their book is a lot like someone paying a person who likes to fish to spend his whole day fishing! Secondly, I like to teach and mentor others; it gives me a lot of joy to see others achieve their goals in part thanks to the help I gave them (In much the same way, I so enjoyed helping you learn and master new skills when growing up, from learning your colors and counting to using a scissors and throwing a great spiral pass).

I also like to write, but most of my efforts these days are on nonfiction pieces rather than fiction - though I've got plenty of short stories and novels started. They are just very time consming (albeit fun) to write, and I find penning nonfiction and editing others' works more lucrative. Scan through my blogs and websites, and you're certain to come across my published writing.

The first story I ever wrote that wasn't a class assignment was in second grade. I wrote a "Star Trek" tale for a friend of mine, who was an Asian-American. Mr. Sulu was his favorite character, and he always complained that there were no episodes in which the helmsman saved the day. So I wrote a story in which Mr. Sulu rescues Captain Kirk on a dangerous planet!

You always loved to make up and to hear stories when we were together. I have a confession to make: I'd always guide your storytelling and teach you terms of the trade in hopes that you'd become an excellent writer one day yourself! In fact, in one story you were going to have our main character die, and I said, "But you can't kill him! He's one of our lead characters!"

Like a typical writer, you weren't too keen on having someone else tell you how your story should go, but after a while, you relented!

Garbage trucks: Your fave Matchbox cars

When  you were two years old, Kieran, little Matchbox cars by far were your favorite toy. Should we go to Target or Wal-mart or Albertson's supermarket, you were certain to want to look at them and get one.

You most liked the garbage trucks. I'm not certain why, for you were deathly afraid of real garbage trucks whenever they came to our house each week! If you heard one on the street, you'd come running and crying to me for protection. Then I'd take you outside and hold you as we watched the garbageman pick up the neighbor's bins and then our own. They didn;t seem so frightening in my arms. You always waved at him, and usually he honked his horn back.

Another favorite Matchbox car of yours was the street sweeper. That you never were afraid of when it made its way once a month down the street. We also went out to wave at the driver, and he almost always waved back, and then we'd go inspect how he'd cleaned the curb of leaves and detritus.

Just a couple of quick memories for you. The picture at above right is of two of your Matchbox garbage trucks. A little fuzzy (my apologies), but pehaps one day if you ever want to collect the toys of your past, you'll now know what they look like.

I love you, Kieran

I hope you're able to tell by the entries on this blog that I love you, Kieran. I'm certain you are; you've always been very intuitive and quick to pick up on others' emotions. Still, sometimes the words simply need to be said. And that's all this entry is about. I just want you to know: I love you, Kieran - I always have, I do now, and I always will.

Some places we built some memories of

Yesterday, I saw a lot of places, probably for the last if not for a long time, where we once spent time together. The Twin Cities where you now live offer its own great sights and events, yet it was with some melancholy that these places of our past our not vanquished to memory alone.

There were the famous "Kirk Rocks," as you liked to call them, where Captain Kirk fought the famous Gorn. It's really Vasquez Rocks County Park, and we went there quite a few times (the picture at left is from April 2011), hiking the same trails Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock did, often playing our own "Star Trek" and later cowboy adventures.

Speaking of cowboys, do you remember the McDonalds in Acton that had a horse atop it? Everytime we drove past it while making up cowboy stories, we'd joke about how it was Sheriff Jack's horse, Luke, and say "Get down from there, Luke!"

And as far as McDonalds go, we stopped many times at the one in Santa Clarita next to the new Kohl's along Hwy. 14. Whenever heading into Los Angeles, it was a certain pit stop for a snack or bathroom break.

Maybe one day we'll be able to go back to all of those places again. I hope we don't have to wait so long that you will have a son of your own who we take on the trip - though I can't wait to meet my grandchild!

Fathers Day 2012, RIP

Unfortunatley, we weren't allowed to spend Father's Day with one another today. This is the second of five Father's Days in your life in which we were denied that; the other time was in June 2008 when your mother took you away the first time from me and the two of you lived with Grandma and Grandpa Bignell (my parents). At least you got to see your real grandfather that day.

We spent Father's Day 2011 at Disneyland. You participated in the Jedi Academy, we rode some of the rides in Fantasyland, went into Tarzan's Treehouse, and skipped on over to California Adventure top watch the Green Army Men band. We also got to watch a Beatles tribute band, Paperback Writer, perform at Downtown Disney. It truly was a great day; the only thing sad about it was that I had to bring you back to your mother's that evening, and for me the drive back to San Diego was unbearably long and lonely, as they always were.

I have since learned that Paperback Writer played at Downtown Disney on Father's Day 2012. Oh how I wish I could have taken you and Jane there so we could have watched it together as a family!

Rest assurred, Kieran, I am working night and day to be able to see you  again soon. Hopefully, we will get to spend Father's Day 2013 with one another. We'll be a long way from Disneyland, but I will find something fun for us, guaranteed!

Can't wait to show you some old westerns

Just before we were forced apart, Kieran, you'd taken a real interest in the Old West. You had cowboys and Indians play characters, a cowboy hat and pistol/rifle set we bought at Disneyland, and liked to visit the cowboy heritage museum in Los Angeles as well as Vasquez Rocks where some old westerns were filmed. This all comes back to me today because I'm spending the day with your grandpa and grandma, and grandpa is watching an old western ("The Rebel," I think) on television.

In March/April when I was moving Jane out to California to live with us, along the way I found a DVD with 150 old western TV shows, including "The Lone Ranger," on it.  You never got to see it as it was stuck in one of the many totes we never unpacked, but after Jane moved out, it fortunately was left behind. I can't wait to watch it with you when we are together again!

Remember our many hikes together?

I've started writing a new book about hiking trails, Kieran, this time focusing on those in northern Wisconsin and Minnesota. Sure wish you could join me on some of those trails. While not quite as dramatic as the mountains and deserts we've climbed in Southern California, they're still scenic in their own right, and we still can find rock to touch that is more than a half billion years old.

We did some fantastic hikes together in your preschool days, Kieran, walking beneath 15-story high redwoods, scaling mountain peaks almost two miles about sea level, traipsing miles across bone-dry deserts and dried-up ancient lakes. I'm sure you remember some of them, especially the Kirk Rocks (as you called them), which really is Vasquez County Park. Check out my Facebook photo albums to see if any of the pics jog your memory at all.

I've kept topo maps from all of the hikes we've been on together, so if one day you ever wish to do them again for yourself, you'll be able to. I've also got a box of gems, fossils and cool rocks we've collected over the years on our many hikes. When you're on your own, I'll be happy to give them to you. I've got many stories to share with you about them.

Hopefully we'll soon be together again and once again can get back into the wilds. I'll be thinking of you everytime I step on a new trail this summer.